Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Vapor(POEM)
She's the ghost of things to come. Love, marriage and a family. The absence of which haunts more of my waking moments. I wear the smell of “Please! Pick Me!!!!” and “Where the hell is she?!?!?” At the moment all I have as proof that she exists, Are traces of perfume vapor, Restaurant receipt copies, And remnants of conversations in grocery store isles that end with the realization that she's too old for me. I catch myself pleading and reasoning with myself over this temporary infinity, Being stubborn thinking that praying for her to be what God sends me, Is a waste of prime air time. When I should be esteeming others higher than myself. So what is left? A press-conference on current events with near relatives, And a growing anxiety about mine and everyone else's life schedules.
What to Say(POEM)
I don't know what to say anymore about love.
Youth makes love seem idealized to the point of almost being a waking dream.
But as youth slips in to the grasp of time elapsed,
Time begins to strangle joy and excitement away.
Desperation is the lion growing bolder each day.
I hear the clock ticking...
Rolex doesn't make the biological kind...
Nothing has come close in a long time to grasping my mind...let alone my heart's interest.
Compounding...circumstances and the lack of romantic comedy happenstance.
Chance...after chance.
Yet any courtship takes time to learn the steps of love's dance.
I don't know how to feel about the game anymore.
Like being a Cavs fan when LeBron left for the South beach shore.
Youth makes love seem idealized to the point of almost being a waking dream.
But as youth slips in to the grasp of time elapsed,
Time begins to strangle joy and excitement away.
Desperation is the lion growing bolder each day.
I hear the clock ticking...
Rolex doesn't make the biological kind...
Nothing has come close in a long time to grasping my mind...let alone my heart's interest.
Compounding...circumstances and the lack of romantic comedy happenstance.
Chance...after chance.
Yet any courtship takes time to learn the steps of love's dance.
I don't know how to feel about the game anymore.
Like being a Cavs fan when LeBron left for the South beach shore.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Rainbows - POEM
This moment is calling for every bit of courage I have.
My heart beating fast,
My pulse racing a race of one.
And I stand bracing myself for her to show.
To show and put to ease the skirmishing butterflies I feel.
I feel...
Hopeful.
But there is an awkward anxiety that seeks the deeper places that the light of her smile hasn't reached yet to claim as it's own.
My ears are alert,
Trying to hear if for me her heart groans.
I admit little outside the physically obvious is known,
But from much more barren soil,
The harvest of love has been grown.
I stand firm though.
Glad my own cowardice didn't anticipate her answer “No.”
We've both been through storms...
And the unseen of tomorrow won't claim what of today I know...
Let's find each other...together let's find our rainbow.
My heart beating fast,
My pulse racing a race of one.
And I stand bracing myself for her to show.
To show and put to ease the skirmishing butterflies I feel.
I feel...
Hopeful.
But there is an awkward anxiety that seeks the deeper places that the light of her smile hasn't reached yet to claim as it's own.
My ears are alert,
Trying to hear if for me her heart groans.
I admit little outside the physically obvious is known,
But from much more barren soil,
The harvest of love has been grown.
I stand firm though.
Glad my own cowardice didn't anticipate her answer “No.”
We've both been through storms...
And the unseen of tomorrow won't claim what of today I know...
Let's find each other...together let's find our rainbow.
I Love You Sexy Mother...s!!!
Often when you are in that "getting to know each other" phase of dating, the question of "Kids/Marriage" comes up. In this modern age it seems that more and more women are adamant about not having kids. I couldn't figure out why a woman being opposed to children would bother me so much(other than it pushing against my want to be a father) until I thought about what popular culture is telling us about people who are mothers:
Mother...your life is over...really over once you have kids.
The life of a mother is ALWAYS portrayed either as a hectic life without any enjoyment to be found for herself with her slaving away to tend to the every need of her children. Seldom do you see a mother living a well-balanced life in movies and sitcoms. If she does then there is always an quiet implication that she is not a good mother because she manages to find time for herself at the expense of her mothering life-sentence.
This is probably the greatest lie being told by those brainwashed to push the femanist agenda. Being a mother is selfless. I wouldn't be the man I am today without the love of my mother and her thinking of me at times more than she thought of herself. My question is: What makes being selfless for the sake of your child wrong???? Sorry...life isn't Sex And The City...Life is God, Marriage, Responsibility 1 through Responsibility N and then when things are quiet, some sexual healing. Truth be told, children while taking up a LARGE chunk of our time, don't compare to the other stuff that the world demands of us(Jobs, our community activities, our spouses, and even ourselves)!
What I realized was bothering me when I spoke to women that didn't want to be mothers is the fact that all the myths and legends that they were told all pointed to the fact that they were selfish people(and being told that it was OK). They cared more about themselves than anything or anyone else and being a parent would force their hand into having to be selfless(and we definitely can't have that...). On a deeper level, I realized that these women would NEVER love me as equally as they loved themselves. Parenting is a larger inconvenience than a relationship. If she is so selfish to the point that executing a life function that is the essence of who she is at her core(a woman) then what will she do when my love for her becomes inconvenient??? What happens if I become sick and need her to tend to me and care for me...like...I don't know...a helpless infant/child????
I often said I wouldn't date women that were mothers because of the "complications" that I saw in their lives as they fought the good fight of raising their children. However I've come to my senses about the fact that mothers(present or future/hopeful) are exactly who I want to love and build a relationship with. They have chosen to embark on a life journey of caring for someone more than they often care for themselves...and that's a damn beautiful woman. I don't expect my wife to nurse and care for me like a child...but its a beautiful thing to see a woman that can love outside of her own life...and love life into someone else...especially when all that someone else can do is love them in return...
Mother...your life is over...really over once you have kids.
The life of a mother is ALWAYS portrayed either as a hectic life without any enjoyment to be found for herself with her slaving away to tend to the every need of her children. Seldom do you see a mother living a well-balanced life in movies and sitcoms. If she does then there is always an quiet implication that she is not a good mother because she manages to find time for herself at the expense of her mothering life-sentence.
This is probably the greatest lie being told by those brainwashed to push the femanist agenda. Being a mother is selfless. I wouldn't be the man I am today without the love of my mother and her thinking of me at times more than she thought of herself. My question is: What makes being selfless for the sake of your child wrong???? Sorry...life isn't Sex And The City...Life is God, Marriage, Responsibility 1 through Responsibility N and then when things are quiet, some sexual healing. Truth be told, children while taking up a LARGE chunk of our time, don't compare to the other stuff that the world demands of us(Jobs, our community activities, our spouses, and even ourselves)!
What I realized was bothering me when I spoke to women that didn't want to be mothers is the fact that all the myths and legends that they were told all pointed to the fact that they were selfish people(and being told that it was OK). They cared more about themselves than anything or anyone else and being a parent would force their hand into having to be selfless(and we definitely can't have that...). On a deeper level, I realized that these women would NEVER love me as equally as they loved themselves. Parenting is a larger inconvenience than a relationship. If she is so selfish to the point that executing a life function that is the essence of who she is at her core(a woman) then what will she do when my love for her becomes inconvenient??? What happens if I become sick and need her to tend to me and care for me...like...I don't know...a helpless infant/child????
I often said I wouldn't date women that were mothers because of the "complications" that I saw in their lives as they fought the good fight of raising their children. However I've come to my senses about the fact that mothers(present or future/hopeful) are exactly who I want to love and build a relationship with. They have chosen to embark on a life journey of caring for someone more than they often care for themselves...and that's a damn beautiful woman. I don't expect my wife to nurse and care for me like a child...but its a beautiful thing to see a woman that can love outside of her own life...and love life into someone else...especially when all that someone else can do is love them in return...
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Why Men Dread Marriage.
Why men dread marriage.
I read this article at the behest of a friend's post on Facebook. In the article the author attempts to answer an age old question as to WHY modern women realize in their mid to late 30's that they want to be married and haven't achieved nuptial bliss. My offering for unmarried men:
To men sex abroad is greater than sex in a marriage.
From the time we are old enough to use the bathroom in the upright position we men are told and bathed with the definition that sex is the ultimate expression of manhood. And not just sex with one woman...but with as many as we can manage! This doctrine is taught to us starting from as a boy, “You got you a little girlfriend yet?” all the way to as one of my uncles recently phrased this question, “You ain't got you a little tadda?(some might say "Yam"...don't judge us...sweet potatoes are good...)”
For MOST MEN, sex is the equivalent of money. We brag about how much of it we get and how we don't know what to do with all of it that we have. Yet if you were to run a “sexual background credibility check” on most men they would be bankrupt. So if most of us men don't get buffet style sex, then why the hesitancy to get married to a woman that loves and cares about us? Just as with money, men want to do as little as possible for as much “return” as possible. Why get married when they can fool many women into thinking that casual sex is the first all-essential stop on the road trip to marriage?
Unmarried men are irresponsible and know it.
Marriage is a huge responsibility. The bible says we should love our wives as Christ loved the Church. Christ's love for the Church compelled him to die to secure the eternal fortunes of everyone willing to call Him Lord(enter into subjugation to His life's example). Men who aren't married don't want a woman depending on them unless its for a willing and able sexual partner. These men fail not only to care for the ultimate well-being of these women they profess shallow feelings for, but are unwilling to embrace the needs of anyone else.
Their mothers won't marry them.
No I'm not talking about incest...but unmarried men tend to make a serious mistake when thinking about what characteristics make a good wife. These men expect their future wives to be like their mothers. A mother by nature is designed to nurture, care and love her child in a “do everything for him because he's helpless” sort of way. Men that NEVER grow up emotionally and socially in their view of women often find it hard ho'ing(pun intended) as we'd say back home when the women they meet get tired of having to be the mother of a man-child when what they want to be is loved, cared for and equally adored.
Finally...they never saw their fathers love their mothers.
This isn't just about single moms...but very much about men failing to teach their sons the lessons of *sings* “When a man loves a woman...” One of the real sad parts of my life growing up is that I seldom “saw” my father do anything romantic for my mother. Sure...he paid the bills and put food on the table and took care of the stuff that would have been nearly impossible for a single mom to do. But initially lost to me due to the commercial jamming signal that Hallmark puts out is how the responsibilities of being a husband are only met by a man that has a deep and earnest love for his wife and family. Unmarried men often think that all women want is someone to financially provide for them when really what women want is someone that loves them so much that providing for them and the family they hope to establish are simply brushstrokes on the canvas of a union-center(it's about them not her or him) marriage.
I probably should stop here...Star Trek is paused on my DVR.
I read this article at the behest of a friend's post on Facebook. In the article the author attempts to answer an age old question as to WHY modern women realize in their mid to late 30's that they want to be married and haven't achieved nuptial bliss. My offering for unmarried men:
To men sex abroad is greater than sex in a marriage.
From the time we are old enough to use the bathroom in the upright position we men are told and bathed with the definition that sex is the ultimate expression of manhood. And not just sex with one woman...but with as many as we can manage! This doctrine is taught to us starting from as a boy, “You got you a little girlfriend yet?” all the way to as one of my uncles recently phrased this question, “You ain't got you a little tadda?(some might say "Yam"...don't judge us...sweet potatoes are good...)”
For MOST MEN, sex is the equivalent of money. We brag about how much of it we get and how we don't know what to do with all of it that we have. Yet if you were to run a “sexual background credibility check” on most men they would be bankrupt. So if most of us men don't get buffet style sex, then why the hesitancy to get married to a woman that loves and cares about us? Just as with money, men want to do as little as possible for as much “return” as possible. Why get married when they can fool many women into thinking that casual sex is the first all-essential stop on the road trip to marriage?
Unmarried men are irresponsible and know it.
Marriage is a huge responsibility. The bible says we should love our wives as Christ loved the Church. Christ's love for the Church compelled him to die to secure the eternal fortunes of everyone willing to call Him Lord(enter into subjugation to His life's example). Men who aren't married don't want a woman depending on them unless its for a willing and able sexual partner. These men fail not only to care for the ultimate well-being of these women they profess shallow feelings for, but are unwilling to embrace the needs of anyone else.
Their mothers won't marry them.
No I'm not talking about incest...but unmarried men tend to make a serious mistake when thinking about what characteristics make a good wife. These men expect their future wives to be like their mothers. A mother by nature is designed to nurture, care and love her child in a “do everything for him because he's helpless” sort of way. Men that NEVER grow up emotionally and socially in their view of women often find it hard ho'ing(pun intended) as we'd say back home when the women they meet get tired of having to be the mother of a man-child when what they want to be is loved, cared for and equally adored.
Finally...they never saw their fathers love their mothers.
This isn't just about single moms...but very much about men failing to teach their sons the lessons of *sings* “When a man loves a woman...” One of the real sad parts of my life growing up is that I seldom “saw” my father do anything romantic for my mother. Sure...he paid the bills and put food on the table and took care of the stuff that would have been nearly impossible for a single mom to do. But initially lost to me due to the commercial jamming signal that Hallmark puts out is how the responsibilities of being a husband are only met by a man that has a deep and earnest love for his wife and family. Unmarried men often think that all women want is someone to financially provide for them when really what women want is someone that loves them so much that providing for them and the family they hope to establish are simply brushstrokes on the canvas of a union-center(it's about them not her or him) marriage.
I probably should stop here...Star Trek is paused on my DVR.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Poem: Problem Solver "2+2"
I just want to be your problem solver.
Giving you "4" when all you see is "2+2"
I've seen your situations try and bury you.
And people telling you what when all you need is someone to do.
Let me be your lever,
And you can be my fulcrum.
I'll bring the pulley,
If you can supply the rope.
I hear your division hasn't been done right in a while...
Let me be your denominator and you my numerator,
I've got several places,
We can carry the remainder.
Let me be the geometry,
That fills your Non-Euclidean Space.
Everyone else may offer an educated guess,
But I know all the answers to your multiple choice test.
Can I be the orthotic that supports the arch of your weary foot?
Someone you can trust your weight on?
I'll upgrade your computer,
Let me be your CPU(Constant Pleasure Unit).
See I have several of the answers,
To several of your questions.
I don't have every answer,
But I think I'm missing just a few...
I'm standing here with “4”
And I see you standing there with “2+2”
Giving you "4" when all you see is "2+2"
I've seen your situations try and bury you.
And people telling you what when all you need is someone to do.
Let me be your lever,
And you can be my fulcrum.
I'll bring the pulley,
If you can supply the rope.
I hear your division hasn't been done right in a while...
Let me be your denominator and you my numerator,
I've got several places,
We can carry the remainder.
Let me be the geometry,
That fills your Non-Euclidean Space.
Everyone else may offer an educated guess,
But I know all the answers to your multiple choice test.
Can I be the orthotic that supports the arch of your weary foot?
Someone you can trust your weight on?
I'll upgrade your computer,
Let me be your CPU(Constant Pleasure Unit).
See I have several of the answers,
To several of your questions.
I don't have every answer,
But I think I'm missing just a few...
I'm standing here with “4”
And I see you standing there with “2+2”
Monday, September 20, 2010
Lips to my cheek(Poem)
Lips to my cheek,
The warmth penetrates the ever-vigilant cold that persists to protect the depths of my soul.
I am unable to mount an adequate response.
I am…touched.
Silence reassures the difficulty in the words I might dare say,
This warm moment settles around my shoulders,
Reaching for a closeness time and distance has made alien to me.
Civil romance blurs the line between first and last chances,
And this warmth dances to the rhythm of a heart all too eager to try again.
I close my eyes,
Again the light is becoming too much to take in.
Again,
Bright, vivid colors of a future where moments thirst for our glory.
This is the story,
Of a kiss.
The warmth penetrates the ever-vigilant cold that persists to protect the depths of my soul.
I am unable to mount an adequate response.
I am…touched.
Silence reassures the difficulty in the words I might dare say,
This warm moment settles around my shoulders,
Reaching for a closeness time and distance has made alien to me.
Civil romance blurs the line between first and last chances,
And this warmth dances to the rhythm of a heart all too eager to try again.
I close my eyes,
Again the light is becoming too much to take in.
Again,
Bright, vivid colors of a future where moments thirst for our glory.
This is the story,
Of a kiss.
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